We made it to week three!
Thatās three consecutive weeks of Thank You Thursdays.
Iām practically a model of consistency at this point. š
Last week, I introduced you to the eight Grateful On Purpose creative gratitude practices. And I promised weād actually start DOING them this week.
So here we are.
Weāre starting with The Gratitude Ladder. šŖ
And I have two stories to tell you.
One happened years ago at IHOP. The other happened just a few days ago on Facebook.
Both illustrate something Iāve been living and teaching for years.
Sometimes You Canāt See Whatās Right in Front of You
Years ago, I was at IHOP with one of my sons.
While we were waiting for our food, a car pulled up I knew heād think was cool and be excited to see.
So I said, āLook at that car!ā
Heās looking, but from where heās sitting he doesnāt see anything that was worth my shouting š¤£.
So heās looking at me likeā¦ š
It took me a few seconds to realize, oh wait he canāt see what Iām seeing.
So I had him stand in the chair, and when he saw the car, his face lit up like thisā¦
Now of course, the car didnāt change. It was there the entire time.
But he couldnāt appreciate something he couldnāt see.
And he couldnāt see it from where he was sitting.
But once he changed his POSITION, he changed his PERSPECTIVE.
Thatās one of the early experiences that helped shape what I now call The Gratitude Ladder.
Because sometimes we miss things worth appreciating, not because they arenāt there, but because of the position weāre in.
Letās Climb The Gratitude Ladder
There are three levels.
Level 1: ME
This is where most gratitude practices start.
What am I grateful for?
Whatās good in MY life?
What happened to ME today that I can appreciate?
Nothing wrong with that.
Actually, I think itās a great place to start. But thereās no need to stop there.
Level 2: PEOPLE I KNOW
Now we step up the ladder.
Instead of only asking what IāM grateful for, I start thinking about people I know.
Whatās good in THEIR lives?
What might my wife, kids, friends, neighbors, coworkers, or somebody else I know be grateful for today?
And can I appreciate that something good is happening for them?
Even when it has absolutely nothing to do with me?
Level 3: PEOPLE I DONāT KNOW
Now we climb a little higher.
What about people Iāve never met?
Somebody somewhere is:
Starting a new season with someone they love
Ending a season with someone who hurt them
Getting a breakthrough theyāve been hoping for
Celebrating their child finally using the potty
Receiving some really good news
And on and on and on.
Most of them I donāt know. And will NEVER know.
But I can still appreciate the fact that things are happening that people appreciate, even when I donāt know them.
There are potentially literally MILLIONS of reasons for gratitude happening every day that have absolutely nothing to do with us.
And weāre allowed to appreciate those things too.
Thatās the Gratitude Ladder.
Ironically, I experienced something THIS WEEK that illustrates the gratitude ladder very well.
The Gratitude Ladder: Level Two in Real Life
A few days ago, a family friend who recently read an early copy of my upcoming book, Smile When You Poop, shared something on Facebook.
Sheās going through some genuinely uncomfortable things right now.
But she described how sheās learning to notice whatās good without pretending the difficult things arenāt difficult.
One of the main points of the book is being Grateful IN something, even if youāre not grateful FOR it.
And sheās putting it into practice.
On a day that included anxiety, discomfort, and other frustrations, she was also able to identify more than 20 things that went right.
Her daughterās progress with potty training. A delicious breakfast her husband made. Time with family. Her nieceās laughter that led to everyone laughing. Good food. Chocolate chip cookies. A movie.
A bunch of ordinary things that can be really easy to overlook.
And as I read her post, I found myself crying š„¹ smiling.
Partly because something I wrote was helping someone else. Of COURSE Iām grateful for that.
But also because of what was happening in HER life. All these things that I didnāt personally experience.
And yetā¦
I was grateful that SHE had those things to be grateful for.
Thatās Level 2!
And it happened the same week I was preparing to tell you about Level 2.
I couldnāt have planned that better if Iād tried. š
Ready to Practice Gratitude using The Gratitude Ladder?
You can do this in about two minutes.
Level 1: Think of one thing happening in your own life that youāre grateful for.
Level 2: Think of somebody you know. Whatās something good happening in THEIR life that you can appreciate?
Level 3: Think beyond the people you know. Whatās something good happening somewhere in the world, in the life of somebody youāve never met, that you can be grateful is happening?
Thatās it.
Three levels. Three perspectives. Potentially three completely different reasons for gratitude.
No need to climb all three levels every time.
Some days Level 1 is plenty.
Other days, when itās difficult to find much to appreciate in your own circumstances, stepping up the ladder might help you notice something you wouldnāt have otherwise.
It doesnāt mean your problems disappeared.
It doesnāt mean everything is good.
It just means thereās more good happening than what you can see from your current position.
And sometimes thatās worth remembering.
Do you mind doing something for me?
Hit reply (or I forgot you can comment on the post version too!) and tell me one good thing happening in the life of somebody OTHER than you.
Somebody you know. Or somebody you donāt.
Something you can genuinely appreciate, even though it isnāt happening to you.
I want to hear about it. And if youāre okay with me sharing it with others, maybe your reason for gratitude will become somebody elseās reason too.
Next Thursday, weāll explore Gratitude Everywhen. Yes, Everywhen is a real word no matter how many times Google and Grammarly try to get me to correct it.
Until thenā¦
Stay grateful.
ššæ Conrad
I love the ladder concept bc it expands what you can be grateful for!